Scene—
[The Oval Office, March 26, 2019]
The room, where much American History has taken place, is filled with a group of men: mostly gray haired, physically interchangeable, soft, fleshy, one is orange, one young, with dimples, wearing a pencil suit, another man of an indeterminate age, with an endless forehead, (possibly a vampire), a fly unnoticed on the wall just above a portrait of Andrew Jackson…
~~~
A guttural slurring Queens dialect: “PUTIN SAYS DO IT ALL TODAY, NOW! People will forget we buried the Mueller report… what else can you think of? Pence, stop staring at me.”
The voice of ancient turtle from Kentucky: “We’ll talk about the deficit, say we have to gut Medicare, Medicaid, slash Social Security, and tell Betsy to defund the Special Olympics… fuck it, the whole Affordable Care Act: pre-existing conditions and women’s preventative procedures, like mammograms and Pap smears… “
A southern dialect, an octave higher it would be Scarlet O’Hara: “I don’t have a cervix. Why should I have to pay for it?” (Giggles)
(The sound of men laughing hands slapping backs)
This voice, obviously prepubescent, nasal: “Say it’s unconstitutional.”
Queens: “Barr! Get to work on the pardons! Pence, I feel your eyes on me!”
Vampire: “We’ll need more babies from the border.”
Fred Flintstone: “Force a vote on the green new deal today! Climate change… “
Queens: “I won’t be around to see the damage. What did Melanie say— I really don’t care. Do you?”
(More laughter)
Flintstone: “We’ll throw it all up in the air at the same time like confetti. Keep em running in circles trying to save what they can.
Ancient Turtle: Worried about their basic needs. Mueller and his report are already forgotten.”
Scarlet: “But they’ll never vote GOP again… red states have the highest welfare rates. The blue states are full of workers whose tax dollars maintain the rest of the US.”
Prepubescent: “Ivanka planned for that, don’t worry. No more student loans will be issued… “
Queens: “I love the uneducated. PENCE, LOOK AT SOMEONE ELSE!”
Turtle: “These people vote against their own interests every time.
Prepubescent: “It doesn’t matter how they vote. What was it Stalin said?”
Together they all chant:
“It’s not the people who vote that count, it’s the people who count the votes.”
Queens: “Let’s golf… PENCE, some personal space!”
(Laughing and back slapping ensues as the gray haired men filter out of the Oval Office.)
~~~
A FLY on the wall, just above the painting of Andrew Jackson, speaks in the emptied room:
“The possibility that there will not be a free and fair election in 2020 is real.
The damage we see unfolding will continue. This is a turning point in history. We must fight this obstruction now, it will only get worse. There is still hope if we don’t give up.”
~~~
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