Writing Under the Influence

I’m back! My back! I received a comment on my most recent post that made my week, and made me cry.

I have been off the radar since my back surgery because, as I said in my reply to the above comment by Spitball Fury, Ernesto Hemingway’s most sage advice to writers was: “write drunk; edit sober.” I took his advice. This week, I’ve weaned myself off a narcotic painkiller prescribed after surgery because I’m tired of being a zombie. I’m down to two pills a day. Now I’m feeling like me again, in pain that subsides more each day.

Even though I haven’t posted in almost three weeks, I have been writing. I haven’t been sober enough to edit. Last night, I reviewed some of what I’ve written to see if anything is worth salvaging with an edit. I’ve decided to share my original unedited writing, so you can appreciate my decision not to post it, enjoy.

This is me before drugs, wearing a sexy off the shoulder backless gown provided by… hospital.

Naturally I woke up in pain. My middle child flew in the from New York to drive me to the hospitals. My oldest daughter and son took care of their grandmother, and my dogs. others held down the fort.

Hospitals can be fun. I directed my daughter to use the reclining chair to as if she were a crash test dummy in a car. She jerked back as if out of control then had to pop forward.

“Look more afraid. Don’t anticipate, be jerky. We laughed (or at least I did,) then at 7 poki she left and I was to move. .painkiller, and waiting 30 min for them to kick in. This is personal info put out into the internet under the influence of narcotics, which I know is bad. Also, I just went online to upgrade my phone, which I can not afford to do. 🙃

I had back surgery today after a delay of 3-5yrs. Vertebrae L2,3,4,5 were removed. Only 4/5 were planned. They were replaced with titanium screws and junior mints.

*Some of the above paragraph is inaccurate.

Wait for it…
WTF?! I’m hangry.

I haven’t spoken to my doctor yet, but she’ll drop by this morningw about disk removal- not sure what else. I was just forced to stand despite owe-fucking-eeee. Feeling stabby. Not happy, Bob.

❤️‍🩹 I’m a baby. My daughter spent the day with me- we joked and laughed until she left. That’s when they made me move and now… nuff said. People are worse off, I know.

Ode to My Unremarkable Bony Pelvis- labeled as such in MRI report.

Sadistic neurologist who tested my nerves

I’m back. It is my opinion that if I were to edit the above writing, it would be worthy of a Pulitzer Prize for Literature, am I right? The rest of my notes are equally incoherent, but political. I’ll return soon with something, (hopefully,) less stupid. I have a lot to say. 😉

P.S. Thank you for the encouragement, Spitball.

12 thoughts on “Writing Under the Influence

  1. So glad to hear you are back with us. Back surgery is not for Sissies(?) but I laughed out loud at the reveal of post surgery spread. Now time to heal and hopefully live without the pain. So glad you have kept your sense of humour, you will need it going forward in current times. 💛

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Most definitely good to get that out of the way. Most importantly take care of yourself, and accept as much help from the Kiddo’s as they will give.

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Stuart! I am off narcotics and on the mend. I’ve come to terms with the fact that my future activities will be limited. I had hoped to someday conquer “the worm,” and other such dance moves. I’ll see if the physical therapist can work with me on that. 🤓

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.