The last week in April is among my favorite weeks of the year. Spring is in the air; tulips in full bloom, rhododendrons budding, hydrangeas showing signs of life, an 0600 FBI search of Rudy Giuliani’s condo on Madison Avenue, and his Park Avenue office executed. Ah, spring.
One of the aforementioned joys is unique to this year– the investigation into Giuliani. Rudy, Rudy, Rudy. Which of his crimes will take him down? Although Giuliani played a part in the insurrection on 1/6, riling up the crowd shouting “let’s have trial by combat,” that is an investigation for another day. Seriously- the guy is a douche. (👈🏻Me using my French language skills.)
I had my windows open this week and the warm breeze was delicious. Can you smell the viburnum? It’s almost too fragrant.
Rudy is currently under investigation for his involvement in attempts to strong-arm Ukraine, the scandal which resulted in that former guy’s first impeachment. The DOJ is serious about the Foreign Agents Registration Act, (FARA.) It is a federal crime: the attempt to lobby or influence the U.S. government at the request or direction of a foreign official without making it known to the Department of Justice. The search of Giuliani’s home and office resulted in the confiscation of his electronics and files.
This begs the question, who does Rudy work for? Don’t stress, this is multiple choice:
- Ukrainian officials or businesses
- He’s a self serving independent contractor
Correct answer: Yes
He used Russian money to persuade Trump to fire Ukraine ambassador Marie Yovanovitch.
“She’s going to go through some things.” ~TFG (that former guy)
Giuliani was balls deep (👈🏻me using my “you kiss your mother with that mouth” language skills) in TFG’s attempt to pressure Ukrainian President Zelensky to fabricate a Hunter Biden crime.
Rudy had us going for a while after 9/11. “America’s mayor” was an illusion we needed at the time. He took advantage of the opportunity to be seen as a beacon of light in our darkest hour. He was the same Rudy he is today— a bumbling mobster who smears opponents, casting them as corrupt and intellectually challenged. He could teach a community college course in gaslighting 101. (I’m not disparaging community college.)
I just had a flashback to Paul Manafort and Mike Flynn. Unfortunately, that former guy pardoned those two criminals, but perhaps they can be brought up on new charges. Criminality is a hard habit to break.
Back to leaky hair, hands in pants, married my cousin, Giuliani. Rudy has provided so much entertainment in recent years.
Speaking of the “Giuliani probe,” remember his “I was tucking in my shirt” excuse when caught on tape by Borat with his hand down in pants while laying on a bed in a room with an actress he thought was a 15-year-old girl? Good times.
I’m old enough to remember when Rudy’s ass dialed an NBC reporter who listened to Giuliani talk trash about the Bidens and discuss a need for cash. He’s not as smart as he looks, which is bad because he looks like an idiot.
“The problem is we need some money,” ~Giuliani
Per the Times, prosecutors are also scrutinizing Giuliani’s relationship with Yuriy Lutsenko, an official who aided Giuliani and his associates in their Joe and Hunter Biden dirt-digging mission while also pressing them to fire Yovanovitch.
“It’s like so unfair.” ~Philosopher45
What’s this? 👇🏻
“The FBI also arrived Wednesday morning at the D.C. area home of another attorney who had dealings with Ukrainians and remains close to Giuliani and Trump, Victoria Toensing, and took her cellphone pursuant to a search warrant, according to a person familiar with the episode.”
Toensing was reportedly at meetings with Giuliani, Solomon, and…
Devin Nunes’ top aide.
House Intel Committee Ranking Member Devin Nunes, like so many GOP members of Congress, is a threat to national security. But oh boy, Devin Nunes, who presided over TFG’s first impeachment trial, appears to be caught in this vortex—moo.
I indulged myself yesterday, purchasing a redolent lavender tree from Costco .
I have fond memories of the time Representative Eric Swalwell outed Devin Nunes during the impeachment trial.
I love spring!