You may have recently become aware, as have I, of chatter widely spread among Trump supporters: a purported second Civil War would commence today, July 4, 2018… instigated by the Libtard Brigade.
I have been known to answer to the term when it is directed at me and as such, was hurt to have been left out of the planning phase of any skirmish of that kind. I convinced myself the omission was merely an oversight and was not, by any means, meant to be a direct cut or an indirect means of releasing me from my service to the cause. I planned accordingly.
I own a high level of fear, with the knowledge that the legion of libtards would be armed only with facts, while polo shirt clad Troop Trump, the Red Caps, would be armed to the gums, in gaps between their brown tobacco stained teeth, with tiki torches and all the weapons the NRA could conjure up.
Without consortium of a trusted steed and with the knowledge that my erstwhile beloved Irish Wolfhound has likely fully decomposed, (having met her maker six years yore) I updated my Uber App and waited for a tweet informing me of the location of this oppugn, planned by my people without my aid or knowledge.
The tweet did not come. My thesaurus I returned to the safety of it’s book cabinet and relocked the glass door meant to keep unwitting book browsers safe. I then tucked the key into my bodice, for future use. Words can hurt.
A tweet was finally received, but it informed me the Second Civil War has been delayed, rescheduled to Tuesday, November 6th. For this, I have received my call to arms. The polling station is where I will be found; my vote will not be suppressed. Winter is coming.