And Now a Distraction, Brought to You by Epstein’s Corpse

This headline caught my eye:

“Jeffrey Epstein’s Autopsy More consistent with Homicidal Strangulation than Suicide.”

I must disclose it is a Fox 🙄 News Story, most likely timed to distract the public from the impeachment wheel that keeps on rollin.

Since I am suffering from impeachment distress, caused by the fact that a lifelong criminal is still occupying the White House, I thought I’d lighten things up by writing about the death of the well connected serial sex offending pedophile sex trafficker, 66-year-old Jeffrey Epstein, now deceased.

I’ll repeat this for those of you who did not hear the news last summer: He was awaiting trial in August when he was found hanging in his cell.

The circumstances were suspicious. That is an understatement.

Former New York medical examiner, Dr. Michael Baden, a pioneering forensic pathologist with a 50-year medical career under his belt, who was commissioned by the brother of said sexual deviant, confirms what we already knew:

This was not a boat accident! (Jaws reference) It was not a suicide either!

What do I think was suspicious? Epstein’s death occurred thanks to a series of unfortunate events that individually might pass as negligent, but combined seem hardly credible.

• Trump’s fixer, US Attorney General Bill Barr, visited Epstein the day before he was ”found.”

• Epstein had been found semi-conscious on his prison cell floor with marks around his neck two weeks before his death, at which point he was placed on suicide watch.

Federal Prisons policy dictates that inmates on suicide watch be placed in specialized cells that include: “easy access to the room, unobstructed vision of the inmate at all times, and limited availability of objects, materials, or architectural features that would allow for easy self-injury,” according to a letter sent to the House Judiciary Committee’s chairman, Jerry Nadler, D-N.Y., and ranking member, Doug Collins, R-Ga.

• At some undisclosed date and time before his death, Epstein was removed from suicide watch and assigned a new cellmate.

• His cellmate was moved, meaning Epstein was alone in his cell.

• Security cameras were mysteriously off during the time of his death.

• Correctional officers fell asleep and hadn’t made their 30-minute rounds for more than 3 hours.

AG Bill Barr rushed to judgment, announcing almost immediately that Epstein’s death was a suicide, and he claimed he was outraged that the incident occurred.

Considering Barr’s history of lying and bullying, his habit of wielding the power of his office to protect Trump, I believe his version of events must reflect the opposite of what really occurred because every day is opposite day in this ass-clown administration.

What else was convenient?

The Manhattan federal prison where Epstein was ”suicided” has a history of security breaches.

What else was blatant?

The corpse had injuries inconsistent with self-inflicted wounds, meaning someone else inflicted them-— my captain obvious deduction.

Barr will not release DNA results from the sheet Epstein “used to hang himself.”

Dr. Baden’s observed the autopsy and found:

“the injuries more consistent with homicidal strangulation than suicidal hanging,” such as:

• “Hemorrhages in Epstein’s eyes that were common in homicidal strangulation and uncommon in suicidal hangings,”

• “Two fractures on the left and right sides of his larynx,”

• “A fracture on the left hyoid bone above the Adam’s apple— extremely unusual in suicidal hangings and could occur much more commonly in homicidal strangulation,”

Dr. Baden’s analogy, as described in the (Fox🙄) story:

If a person weighed 120 pounds and their head weighed 10 pounds, there would be 110 pounds of pressure on the neck at the jaw during a hanging. But, if someone put a hand around a person’s neck and squeezed, that could double or even triple the pressure on the neck.”

Because the facility where Epstein was held was a federal prison, the Attorney General, Bill Barr, had ultimate jurisdiction over the investigation into his death.

And the good Doctor Baden sums it all up as follows:

“It appears that this could have been a mistake,”

Ya think? I think it was planned, maybe by mistake, but probably not.

SOME JAIL STAFFERS NOT COOPERATING WITH DOJ INVESTIGATION INTO EPSTEIN SUICIDE, SOURCE SAYS

EPSTEIN’S ATTORNEYS ‘NOT SATISFIED’ WITH AUTOPSY RESULTS THAT CONCLUDED FINANCIER DIED BY HANGING

Jeffrey Epstein’s autopsy more consistent with homicidal strangulation than suicide, Dr. Michael Baden reveals — Fox News

JEFFREY EPSTEIN’S FORMER EX-COP CELLMATE AT NYC LOCKUP MUST HAVE BETTER LIVING CONDITIONS, JUDGE RULES