Richard III Is About Me And My Lawn


“Now is the winter of our discontent. Made glorious summer by this sun of York.”
It’s not quite glorious summer yet, but I might finally get a reprieve from the constant shoveling of oppressive snow on my portentous driveway. This winter was brutal, relentless, a constant one (blizzard) two (sub zero temperatures) punch, rinse repeat.

“Out of my sight! Thou dost infect mine eyes!”
Looking out my back door, I see that the last of the snow has finally melted. I can at long last see the ground. Now that I see the ground however I am sadly reminded that I could not find the time to rake my leaves in October. I see that those leaves still need to be raked, lots and lots of them.

“I am determined to prove a villain,
And hate the idle pleasures of these days.”
Why could the leaves not have withered and decomposed as I have done these past months? Oh why can I not burn these confounded leaves and my entire lawn, so that I can go inside ameliorated, and watch my ‘White Queen’ DVD? What a lamentable misfortune my life has become.

“And all the clouds that lour’d upon our house In the deep bosom of the ocean buried.”
I curse that damnable 200 year old mighty oak that lour’ds over my house, casting shadows until it purges it’s leaves on my lawn. I curse my old house near the loch. I curse the loch and the loch effect snow that I toil over month after month. I curse . . .

“Conscience is but a word that cowards use, devised at first to keep the strong in awe”
I curse the wind for not taking those leaves to my neighbors lawn!
He has a leaf blower, and a mulcher. I curse his leaf blower! I curse his mulcher! I curse my neighbor!

“Dispute not with her: she is a lunatic.”
Homeownership has made me crazy.

A Special thank you to William Shakespeare.
This post written in response to: The Daily Post, Daily Prompt: Lookin’ Out My Back Door
Look out your back window or door — describe what you see, as if you were trying to convey the scene to someone from another country or planet.

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