Trump’s New York Criminal Trial, Day One

On his way into the courtroom yesterday, Donald Trump redirected his plodding gait toward the press area. The feted loaf of haggard decomposition spoke.

“…Nothing like this has ever happened before…” (Will he use this phrase again during his next criminal trial?)

Pardon my incomplete quotes. I just can’t with him. He spoke a dozen words when my ears started ringing. Then there was a whooshing sound like I was in a wind tunnel with a shop-vac. I blinked a few times, then focused again.

“… Every legal scholar says…” (Does he mean Rudy Giuliani?)

As you see, I caught four more words before I decided he’s laying on the same self-pity, I’m the victim, and “they will come after you next” crap. That was when my ears bled because I despise his voice. My vision went black because I abhor his face. And when he shuffled off I recovered. The press must know he would imprison them if the opportunity presented, regardless, they captured his monologue for posterity.

This is the initial of four long awaited criminal trials. New York has him first.

What I learned: Trump faces 34 counts of first-degree falsifying business records. A victimless crime, you say? There is no such thing. Those of us who obey the rules suffer by picking up the slack for people like this diaper clad marshmallow.

Trump has tampered with jury selection with his threats and the doxing of everyone involved in his civil cases and more recently his criminal trials, including the judges’ families, most recently targeting the daughter of the judge in this trial after they issued his gag order.

As a consequence breaching the above order, the court will fine Trump $1,000. Each social media post constitutes a violation. (This is inadequate punishment, IMO.)

Trump received two warnings from the judge:

• If he speaks out in the courtroom he will be removed by guards and placed in a holding cell.
• If he doesn’t show up every day of this trial, a warrant would be issued for his arrest.

The “not woke” jackass who calls our duly elected President, Joe Biden, “sleepy” couldn’t keep his eyes open in court. The internet has dubbed him:

• “Sleepy Don”
• “Don Snoreleon”
• “The Nodfather” (Don spelled backwards is nod.)

Please feel free to add yours to the comments.

The slumbersome slob (that is my addition) whose heavy head hung with a slack jaw obviously does not have the cognitive ability to be president. Or maybe his legal team drugged him because this is the best version of him.

Yesterday was only jury selection. They interviewed approximately 100 potential jurors. Half said they could not be impartial and were immediately excused. At the end of the day (I hate that phrase, but it is literal here) not a single juror was assigned.

Trump now claims he needs a day off because he wants to attend his son… what’s his name? The tall one of Melanie’s… yeah, Barshum, he doesn’t want to miss that graduation.

BEEP BEEP BEEP NEWSFLASH:

Of his four other (known) children, he has attended [checks notes] zero high school graduations.

We have some ignorant people in this country. Dear Trump supporter outside the courthouse, who argued with the reporter (who didn’t bother to correct her), this is not about his morals, or cheating on his pregnant wife. These are financial crimes, some of which pertain to Stormy Daniels only because Trump used campaign funds for personal use and attempted to conceal his agreement, which is a cover-up.

Catch and kill practices are used by the rich who often pay to have a story killed. Hush money is not a business expense, and treating it as such constitutes a financial crime. He falsified official records to unlawfully influence the 2016 presidential election.

His former “fixer” attorney Michael Cohen served time for this crime, done by Trump’s order.

More jury selection today. Will he catch more 💤 s? Time will tell.

*I did not create the above memes, or draw on the photo, but where possible I left watermarks to give credit where due.