Fifteen Fun Ways to Pass the Time While Waiting for Election Results

For the sake of your mental health, avoid getting caught up in nonstop election analysis. I cannot focus on my book. If you can’t either, and need ideas on how to pass the time, here’s what I’ve done today—feel free to follow suit.

1. Drop dog, G, at the vet for an unscheduled follow-up appointment. They’re monitoring him because he could not urinate last night, and it was a whole big thing.
2. Check time. Calculate how long it will before the first polls close on the East Coast.
3. Attend scheduled occupational therapy. Use this visit as psychotherapy because you can tell the Occupational Therapist everything that’s bothering you.
4. Check time. Do the math.
5. Pick up dog, G, from vet. He’s fine. Consider life choices because between last night’s ER-vet visit and today’s follow up, the credit card is smoking.
6. Check time.
7. Shampoo the rug that someone peed on yesterday. My critical thinking skills have left me fairly certain it was my other dog, E, because she had a functioning bladder. She will be the last dog I ever adopt!
8. Check time.
9. Look for dogs and cats who need homes on Petfinder.com. Do not adopt any of them.
10. Make those calls I’ve been putting off: the plumbing supplier, again, to see if your part has arrived. Call the dentist to schedule that overdue appointment.
11. Check the time.
12. Do not go on Twitter, the bots are out in full force.
13. Check the time. Confirm the clock is functioning correctly; because it feels like forever.
14. Create a list of today’s accomplishments and post it online.
15. Check time.

This is torture.