Improbably Probable

If there is one thing I know for sure, it’s that there will always be greed, hunger, taxes, corruption, and religious wars… That is predictable. 

What’s unpredictable is how I will stain my shirt on any given day, and at what point in the day it will happen. One never knows when the day will take a turn for the worst. 

Let’s examine this day. I woke with my alarm, long before dawn cracked. It was a typical struggle to get going, and as per my routine, I headed straight for the coffee maker. While the coffee was brewing, I made a smoothy with berries, yogurt, etc, which I used to wash down my vitamins. I grabbed a clean shirt and headed for the ironing board. After my shower, I dressed in my freshly ironed crisp white blouse…and other boring work clothes.

On my way out the door, I patted the hair straightener and unplugged my dog. I made it two blocks when I realized I had forgotten my coffee on the kitchen counter. I checked the time, turned the car around, ran in, grabbed my coffee cup, and settled back in for my forty minute drive. 

I use the commute to work on my French. I’m on French level 3 in my audio books after nearly one year of study, and if I do say so myself, I am becoming quite the proficient…I am very nearly fluent. I stopped my car for a long freight train, and decided to test my dialect with a new language app on my phone. I spoke into it using my best French: “Est-ce que vous aime mais mais rien brin ou tasse de café”. Wow—I even impress myself. “Would you like to have a cup of coffee” is a phrase I will definitely use someday. I hit the translate button and learned that what I said was: “What is love you but but nothing strand or cup of coffee.” Hmm…I might need a human teacher at some point. 

I raised my travel cup to my mouth, thinking “This cap doesn’t feel like it’s screwed on.” Then, because I’m a genius, I tipped the cup toward my mouth. The cap fell off, and my shirt was doused with what I’m sure was delicious hot coffee. 
Voila, if you guessed the spill would happen during my drive to work, you are correct! My clumsiness is predictably unpredictable. The moral of the story today is: if you forget your coffee, leave it at home.

July 16, 2016, One Word Daily Prompt: Unpredictable~ <a href=””>Unpredictable</a&gt;

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