Seriously, is it me? What’s the deal with today’s prompt? I mean it’s not like we haven’t already done the “Write in the style of ____” recently.
Anyway if I have to, I’d like to see Jerry Seinfeld write my biography, because it’s not like anything happens in my life, so no mystery novelist would take that job. What’s up with that? It might read like this:
Lydia is about work and her imaginary relationship with that British actor- oh, and her kids. You ever notice that teenagers today have a secret weapon that we didn’t have when we were teenagers. It’s technology. They’re experts at technology. Try to use it against them, and it becomes a chess game, and the pieces are all the electronic devices in the house. You take their phones away, they figure out how to text on the television. You turn off the wifi and they’re texting their friends using the laptop. You take that away, and they use something else. They can block every move you make. Your electric toothbrush is the Queen. When they take that in their room and you hear a ping, check mate games over.
And what’s with the wet towels on the floor? You ever notice that the closets have no shoes in them? That’s because they’re everywhere else in the house: the bathroom the middle of the kitchen, the stairs. You walk in Lydia’s house and it looks like you were left behind during the rapture, dozens of pairs of shoes with no people.
Let’s talk about work. You ever notice that it’s a four letter word?
The Daily Post, May 1, 2015, Daily Prompt: