“Uranus is moving through your sign (until 2017), and that’s what makes you so captivating to others. Others will surely be magnetized by your presence and captivated by your antics.”
This was taken from my actual horoscope, and clearly illustrates why I don’t read horoscopes. Please expound, you say. Alright. I don’t want to become too aware of my captivating moving anus, because that would make it less… captivating, and could possibly hinder it’s movement.
THE DAILY POST
Oct 29, 2014
Yesterday you invented a new astrological sign. Today, write your own horoscope — for the past month (in other words, as if you’d written it October 1st).